Wednesday, October 24, 2012

working mom blues

Today I got a case of the working mom blues.  Now that evening has settled in and the kids are asleep I am starting to unwind a little bit, but it might take a while because boy, was I wound up today.

The early hours of this morning (and they seem so, so long ago) began with croup coughs from Jamin which never fail to bring me into an immediate mom panic. I don't like my little ones not feeling good.  I don't like having to try and arrange Dr. appointments, daycare drop off's and 2 full time jobs in the household.  Especially when trying to figure it all out at 5:30 am.

We got our schedule together and off to work I went.  Work was fine, but long and busy, and as I was walking out of work a little bit late I remembered the Halloween party at the library.  With only 20 minutes to get there I spent the whole drive playing out strategies in my head:

Pick up the kids and go straight there with no Halloween costumes or diaper bag?  What if Owen has explosive poop? What if he gets hungry?

Pick up the kids, stop at home, let the dog out, get the diaper bag and costumes and be terribly late?  How long would it take me to haul the carseat inside while packing the diaper bag?

Go home first, let out the dog, grab the bag and costumes and rush to get the kids in a whirlwind? But then I would be backtracking a mile!

Just skip the whole thing?  I may have had started having wild fantasies about taking a nap right about then and had to snap back to reality.

I ended up picking up the kids, stealing a diaper for each kid from their daycare stash at school and storing them away in my purse. Knowing I could bum some wipes from someone if needed I brought my kids to a Halloween party with no baby supplies and no costumes.  Mom fail.

Did I mention when I left work my car wouldn't start?  The beast finally revved up and I was able to be on my way.  After the library I headed home to finally get that elusive diaper bag and let out the dog before taking the kids to Mimi & Papa's to visit.  And then the car wouldn't start at all.  So, I had to cancel my hair appointment for tonight.  And the football game party for tomorrow. And my house is so messy.  Sigh.

I hate to say but tonight I was just going through the motions.  Dinner couldn't get over fast enough, bath time was all business, I was a woman with a mission: get the children to bed.  And now they are and I'm feeling guilty for rushing away a day of childhood and babyhood.  YOLO, right? Seize the day.  I need to remember to cherish these babies as babies while their babies (say that a few times fast).

How do these women do it all?  The ones with pristine holiday crafts, well planned dinners (organic and gluten free usually, too, of course), sparking clean kids and a little thing called a full time job on the side?  Please, share your secrets!

Anyways, woe is me.  There are much worse days and I should remember to be eternally thankful that I have healthy children to bring to Halloween parties, a job to work hard at and a roof over my head.  By the time I let the stress unravel from today I'll remember this sweet, blessed life I've been given and be thankful tomorrow morning is another chance to get it right..extra bubbles and splashing during bathtime sounds good.

1 comment:

  1. I love you! I think you're doing a great job and I hope you have lots of time to relax and enjoy the upcoming holiday season! (aka swirly twirly gumdrop time)


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